October 13, 2011 at 9:12 pm 2 comments

I thought I would pop in on a little break from my identity crisis and say hi.

Not really, I’m totally being really dramatic.  Identity crisis just seems like some fun way of making light of the embarrassing and miniscule issues I’m having with my personal style lately.  First world problem much?  God.  I’m like some kind of bad joke.

Basically, this is what I need to always remember, because in those moments where I’m feeling like garbage, for reasons related to personal goals, successes, and achievements, I have to think of this and get in this mind-set:

stolen from Erin’s Pinterest… again

So, yeah, that’s pretty true, for the most part.

I can think of two things that come to mind immediately.  Parenting and jogging.

Parenting is not always comfortable.  Not financially.  Not socially.  Not physically.  Not emotionally.  But its more MAGICAL than it is UNCOMFORTABLE that is foooooor sure.  And it’s not that it was never not in my comfort zone, but when I was pregnant, I had my doubts oh yes I did.  Turns out, I knew what the heck I was doing… kinda.  There’s just ebbs and flows, like, big time.  But not so much even the comfort stuff, is the magic that comes from parenting.  It’s big-time magic.  Sometimes it’s really hard to see that magic though.  Like when you haven’t slept and it’s 4am and the baby is still screaming.  Or conversely, same situation but the baby is wanting to play and you’re all like SLEEEEEEP. mommy wants some. NOW. NOW NOW NOW.  And maybe your voice isn’t as lovey-dovey and soft as it was earlier that day?   And also, I’m sure there are many magical moments that come along with that whole upcoming phase of toddlerhood.

And running.  Who ever thought I would tackle the physically uncomfortable (at least in the beginning) task of running?  for run.  like, not running away from some scary disastrous moment.  Running as a personal goal.  Running as therapy.  Heck no.  I did not want to be seen running down the street.  That was a major fear of mine, and, something that wasn’t in my comfort zone.  But I did it anyway, and magic happened.  I still swear to this day there were fireworks.  Real ones, not just the ones in my step, or my voice, or my eyes, or my heart, or my head.  I conquered it big time, and I’m still going with it.  I’m still running, not AS regularly as before, and I can tell, because my spirit is going dooooown with every day that passes that I don’t run or exercise.  It is something I need to do.  Is it something I want to do?  Nope.  Not every day.  Especially as this weird autumn winter seasonal thing is creeping up.  Note to self: up the Vitamin D, up up up.  And get my ass off the couch.  Even there – there’s that comfort thing again.  Does it feel good to sit on the couch?  Yup.  Better than it does to get all geared up and run.  But the magic happens when you run, when I run, and the magic happens after I run, too.  That magical shit lasts on and on and on.  It’s something I have to do, I really, really have to.  I can’t say it enough.  It is my therapist.  It is my bag of chips with a cheap-ass little container of dip.  It is my friend and I have to be kinder to it and more giving like it has been to me.

Soooooo my friends.  Get out there and do shit you’re fearful of.  It feels really really freakin’ good.  There’s bumps, sure.  There’s pains, and there’s hurt, and most of all there’s joy and there’s MAGIC.  That is the best part.  And if they had chosen a different phrase than “where the magic happens” or even substituted a different word for “magic”, this little mini flow chart might not be as cool or inspirational.  Magic just has a certain ring to it, and it works for me.

What have you tackled outside of your comfort zone, or what do you plan to take on in future endeavours? 


Entry filed under: Health & Fitness, Love, Mamabear. Tags: , , , , , , , .

Stuff. I am.

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Chandra  |  October 16, 2011 at 4:32 pm

    I hated the idea of perogies before meeting the man…. Was forced by his mom to sit at a table and try them. Now I love them. Many things have happened that way, whether having or being with a partner you trust helps you try new things… I guess it’s worked for me! Actually trying veggies, petting sting rays and sharks and actually going to VS and feel good… Maybe even confident to even peek out of a dressing room. Going to al-anon and telling a parent how much being around an alcoholic makes everyone think you are a liar. Watching MIL pass away from cancer doing full care and dealing with a lot of negativity. Gosh this was weirdly cathartic…..

    • 2. tristadawn  |  October 16, 2011 at 9:49 pm

      Thanks for stoppin by and reflecting. Bravery is beautiful :)


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